Last Grandpa Standing

Last night I got a text and photo from my accountant. It read: Sam and Josie only have one grandpa…please be more careful dad.

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This rubbed me the wrong way. They also only have one grandma as they lost their other very sweet grandma Darlene almost two years ago. So why am I bothered? This is not the first time I’ve gotten one of these kinds of messages. I get them on a regular basis.

So why doesn’t Michele get these texts? She’s been through some death defying times herself. Someday I’ll go into a long expose about this situation but permit me to share a couple or three pictures just to illustrate how Michele constantly flirts with danger herself.

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This is Michele sitting around a campfire years ago. The picture is slightly hazy with smoke from the fire. She is sucking in smoke like crazy. She can’t get enough through her nostrils so she had to open her mouth to inhale a greater volume of carcinogenic particulates. Meg, our sweet daughter, is sitting beside her doing the same thing and yet she has the nerve to get after me for physically destructive activities!

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And speaking of Michele and smoke, we were at a concert a few years ago. The concert wasn’t all that good. The reason Michele has the big smile on her face is she is enjoying the two chimney stacks next door and their fragrant emissions. Did Meg get after her for this very dangerous situation? I don’t think so.

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And yet another close call occurred in our van. She was at the Merrills Corner Post Office one day and backed up right into a power pole. You can see the damage on the right rear bumper. She could have been killed!

It shook me up so bad I found a traffic cone and instructed her that after this, she must do like the utility guys do and put the cone out each time she parks. When she goes to leave, she must pick the cone up and visually inspect and get familiar with the area behind her.

This incident also irritated me a bit. The van was almost totaled and lowered it’s value several times over.

The only other comment I have on this situation is my life is probably in grave danger now that I’ve published the campfire photo.

One more thing. My nose and forehead are dang sore this morning but at least it quit bleeding sometime during the night.

3 responses to “Last Grandpa Standing”

  1. Kati S. Avatar
    Kati S.

    Your head might get worse soon after your wife reads this piece and sees the pictures. I have often wondered if she doesn’t read your material since you have managed to stay married. Or she has the patience of a saint.

  2. brian Avatar
    brian

    Nice try “Benny” but your mother would agree with me that you are in a league of your own.

    1. Recovering Idiot Avatar
      Recovering Idiot

      Ditto back at you Brian. But your league is cooler than mine😀

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