At last, I’m finally making decent money from my inventions. However there is a downside. My kid brothers and sisters are extremely jealous and trying to crimp my style. Read on for the full scoop.

My first invention from 18 years ago is pictured here. Sales have been great, far exceeding my expectations.

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Propane dealers from sea to shining sea can’t do without it.

A homemade video showing it in action (Start at the 45 second mark)… https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=owhm9zHV7P4

Here’s one of the first YankATanks I built, long ago outliving it’s depreciation schedule and now relegated to a scrap area.

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And there’s more where that came from…

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This is the original prototype of another idea I call the Tire Squire and Truck Tire Squire. It’s fun to see what can happen if you have a little vision!

Just yesterday we shipped one to a tire company in Georgia. The only man-powered machine on earth that will pick up and haul 8 truck tires. All packed up and ready to ship:

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Action shots of the offspring from the original old beater… https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aLUm0FYxnw4 and https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dw8DvudXqZ0

You may ask “Have you ever made something you didn’t sell?” I know it’s hard to believe but 95% of the things I’ve developed have never made it to the production stage.

One time I heard the phrase that people would beat a path to your door if you built a better mousetrap. So I did.

To get rid of rodents at the shop I found some great green mouse bait. The mice loved it but they carried it off to their winter quarters and came back for more. It just didn’t do the whole job. So I set to work constructing a gizmo to destroy Mickey.

I used the mouse bait to entice the mices to an area that featured my new but heretofore untested premier 110-volt Mouse Trap/Vaporizer. As you can see, it was an awesome invention!

Right off, I could see that I needed to do some improvements on it if I was going to get UL Laboratories to give their stamp of approval on it.

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It worked great because I never once found a mouse lounging around the area. They had all been vaporized!

It never really took off. The only thing that took off from this handy little device was me on those unlucky days when I forgot about the high-charged ring and happened to brush up against it as I walked past. I didn’t vaporize but I’m sure I lost a pound or two from all the excitement and hopping and yelling and screaming.

Instead of calling it 110-volt Mouse Trap/Vaporizer, maybe I should market it as a 110-volt Weight Reduction device.

Speaking of weight reduction, here’s another one of my inventions that can help you lose weight and yet I never sold a single one. Yet.

The original prototype:

 

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y4Mggzai_ac

Some of the fruits of my simple creations that do sell can be found at moveitinc.com

The story behind this post is my dilemma with my family…

I rent a building or two from my eight siblings so I can continue to turn my daydreams into nightmares and once in a while into real machines. Contained in this rented area are the remnants of my work over the last 18 years. Unfortunately, mechanical inventions necessarily produce a pile of prototypical expensive junk. At least mine do.

I’ve found it’s hard to part with my babies since I’ve put so much time, effort, hope and money into them.

However, my evil landlords have decreed that my scrap pile must be eliminated. They don’t have the sentimental attachment that I do for the rusty old relics. I finally had to quit crying, capitulate to my underling siblings and begin trashing my historical treasures.

Here is a small sample of my subject material:

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As I started gathering up my works of art, the inanimate objects decided they really didn’t want to vacate the premises. At regular intervals they commenced attacking me to drive home the point that they didn’t want to leave their birthplace. My body is now sporting multiple contusions, scrapes, cuts, bruises and wounds from these battles.

Here is just one example of their assault on me:

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As I lifted up a large load of metal to drop in the scrap bin, a large slippage occurred and I narrowly missed becoming part of the remnants being thrown away. Notice the missing fingertips that actually did end up in the scrap bin at an earlier date.

Thank goodness my old forklift had a safety cage wrapped around the driver’s seat!

The cleanup is almost complete. In spite of the mindset I had to fight through in order to chuck the stuff, I did it. It was hard.

It was even harder as some of my siblings circled like vultures around the hazardous cleanup site. Once in a while they would swoop in to partake of my treasures before I could get the items loaded in the scrap bin.

Here is pictorial proof of an actual brother absconding with what used to be part of my valuable inventory:

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Like I said to them in the original unsuccessful debate, “This stuff is not junk! I’m going to need it someday.”

One man’s junk is another man’s treasure. Or, in this case…

One brother’s treasure used to be another brother’s treasure.

While we’re on the subject, have you ever had a secret desire to invent something that has never been thought of before?

I did for the majority of my life.

Finally, I quit dreaming, rolled up my sleeves and dove in. The crazy ups and crazier downs of my inventing experiences are detailed here…

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Read the reviews.  Paperback or Hard Cover.

Kindle Book One      Kindle Book Two

Cash winner followup:

And because I’m doing so well with my little inventing business and need more tax deductions, I decided to give out a little cash to my blog followers and commentators. Here’s our first winner who was randomly drawn from Recovering Idiot followers. Image2

Mark Maxfield of Pasco WA and his check for 50 bucks.

Recovering Idiot Followers and Commentators will be drawn from time to time for cash prizes. I do this because it’s fun to make people’s day and I need more IRS deductions.

Don’t miss out!

Mark didn’t!

My back pocket is getting kind of overloaded again. I think I’ll hand out some more heavy greenbacks in June.

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Just for fun and to show appreciation, once in a while if I’m in the mood I’m going to throw cash to followers and commentators of this blog. The winner and other details are at the bottom of this post.

Back to the tutus…

Nine visible ballerinas. One of them carries my genes. Any idea which one?

The poor thing is known as Charlotte. (#5 from the left)

Like Charlotte, I don’t follow the crowd. I do a lot of looking up too. Case in point…

Last fall I was drying corn at midnight and noticed falling corn kernels attacking my bald head. The night was dark and the wind was howling.

After climbing the elevator stairs, I found the tube that was leaking. I could see that to fix this problem I was going to need some very specialized tools. I went back down.

I grabbed a ladder, a flashlight, some duct tape and a strand of baling twine. Me and my equipment then ascended back up the stairway to heaven.

Out of breath, I  arrived at the leak site. I positioned my ladder against the leaky tube and noticed one ladder leg was suspended by nothing but air. I tied some baling twine on the ladder leg, took a deep breath and climbed the ladder to fix the leak.

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Notice the twine supported leg. The picture below shows the height of the work area.

Visualize the dark night and the wind whipping past as I attempted to tape the tube that was a good 60 or 70 feet high.  Did I mention a rung on the ladder was missing and the ladder teetered back and forth on the leaking grain tube at the top?

Finally, the leaking corn got taped shut and I was able to descend to a healthier elevation. Who needs Disneyland when you have a job like mine?

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Thanks to everyone who has signed up to follow this blog! I like blogging and they must like following. Because I’m still a partial idiot and enjoy making someone’s day, once in a while I’m going to throw out a little appreciation cash. (This applies to this blog only. Facebook comments won’t be in the mix.)

Recovering Idiot followers and commentators will be eligible each time I notice some cash burning a hole in my pocket. I’m going to use an online random number generator which will pick out a winner. This way, I won’t be sending cash to just the few friends I have but my large assortment of enemies will also be eligible.

Mark Maxfield of Pasco WA was the Recovering Idiot follower on this first go-around. Congrats Mark!

 

Like the blog? Love the book.

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Read the reviews.  Paperback or Hard Cover.

Kindle Book One      Kindle Book Two

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One of my nephews called and asked if he could borrow my vehicle for his date tonight.

I said “Sure, if you keep it under a hundred and eighty.”

He said he would do his best.

I chuckled because I knew there was no way he would get the old pickup past a hundred and twenty.

Then he said he was allergic to vehicles painted white and preferred a darker colored vehicle. Now what do I do?

 

Like the blog? Love the book.

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Read the reviews.  Paperback or Hard Cover.

Kindle Book One      Kindle Book Two

 

 

 

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In my church, we have a program called “Home Teaching.” Each month teams of two very wise men are assigned to visit each family in our ward. They stop in, check on the family and give us a few words of wisdom.

Our family has great home teachers! They show up each month and have always delivered a stellar and powerful message.

Dan (on the right) is usually spot-on until last month.

Steve (on the left) is always attentive and was totally interested at the beginning of Dan’s greatly anticipated presentation. However, Dan was a little off his game.

Steve visited the Sandman while I got up and walked out to fetch my camera, not wanting to miss a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.

I post this evidence for several reasons.

Dan claims his lessons are top-notch. Not always. (See photo)

Steve claims he loves Dan’s lessons. Not always. (See photo)

Michele claims I’m a lousy photographer. Not always. (See photo)

Michele is always right. But just this once, I disagree.

 

Like the blog? Love the book…

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Read the reviews.  Paperback or Hard Cover.

Kindle Book One      Kindle Book Two

 

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Luckily, these are farm girls, tough as nails. They are also my nieces. Katie on the left, Kiersten on the right. Kiersten drives to school at BYU in her car.

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She got in a minor fender bender the other day.

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BYU is usually a boring and sober school and not prone to false advertising. The school recently decided to promote their Health Center and promptly ran over you-know-who’s what.

I think Kiersten ought to sue them for false advertising. Looks to me more like an Unhealthy Center.

Kiersten no longer drives to BYU in her car.

Like the blog? Love the book…

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Read the reviews.  Paperback or Hard Cover.

Kindle Book One      Kindle Book Two